I matter.
Forgive yourself--for everything that you feel ashamed of, guilty over.
That wasn't the real you, and that wasn't the real me. Those were just costumes.
Our human identities are merely costumes for a Divinity exploring and experiencing itself, and harvesting the gift of wisdom that only comes from pretending to be Human.
We were playing "Let's Pretend" there are good guys and there are bad guys in this grand, SAFE and SACRED, playground--the REALITY/ILLUSION called Earth--all of it done out of love and the desire to discover, to experience, to know thyself.
Several years ago, I awakened from a dream where a dark and shadowy being towered over me, accusing me, calling me, "Dark Lady."
I can't recall any of the rest of the conversation, but I knew the title was fitting for some aspect in me, and I knew the entity was trying to feed off my feelings of guilt for a really dark and evil life-expression of my soul.
In essence, the shadowy entity was an aspect of me, too--a reflection of how I'm monitoring and using guilt and shame to prevent myself from being a cruel and harmful human again. I'm certain that the Dark Lady did some of the most abominable things anyone could do to another--and I'm pretty certain she's a life expression that I used as a motivation for enlightenment and ascension in this lifetime.
All of my life as Penny, I've carried deep feelings of guilt and shame, way out of proportion for anything I've ever done in this lifetime. I've done nothing to warrant such self-condemnation and tight self-monitoring and control. I had a deep fear of harming anyone--even unintentionally--to the point I was paralyzed when it came to making even the simplest choice. It's also made me one of the most compassionately wise and accepting human beings you'll meet.
Ascended masters, Tobias and Adamus Saint Germain both warned that those of us going through the awakening into enlightenment would probably experience these psychic attacks, and that we could command our attackers to leave. That's all we had to do--and they would have to leave.
In the dream, I did exactly that. With no room for feelings of self-doubt, I roared, "LEAVE NOW! I Command you to leave now!" And it did.
The Dark Lady aspect, through my simple self-forgiveness, is free to integrate into my BODY of CONSCIOUSNESS. I now think of all parts of myself integrating together as The Benevolent Rebel.
However, integration doesn't happen instantly. The Dark Lady character first came into my awareness through that dream about a decade ago--and even though I was aware of her in me all this time--ten years later, I've realized her regret and sense of atonement, and self-monitoring have still been influencing the consciousness I have been radiating in my daily life as Penny.
Instead of playing the Leading Lady, the source and center of my realities--I've been playing the Best Friend Supporting Actress to my entire creation.
I've been compromising my own desired realities by supporting and protecting the stories of bits of plasma in the form of all the other actors in my play.
I've been walking around apologizing for simply existing--as though my very breathing the air here is taking oxygen from someone more deserving.
I have been playing the lowly servant role instead of acting as the central and sovereign master who can truly be of service to her creation by being an example that we can consciously create our own realities--a life that flows with ease and grace instead of suffering and sacrifice and guilt.
I even have been sporting a scar on my right cheek that, in looking back, surfaced about the time the Dark Lady dream happened. I didn't do anything in this lifetime to wound myself there. I had a boil appear in that area in high school, but it disappeared without leaving scar tissue. By feeling, intuiting into it--I felt it was a branding wound for witchcraft that was connected with the Dark Lady life expression.
I finally see,the scar has been present in my current life as a reminder to myself to be aware that the Dark Lady is still influencing and skewing my desired manifestations.
She's had me walking the part of the supportive best friend--apologetic and unstar-like in demeanor.
And the energies, in complete service to me, have responded to that limited consciousness by continually manifesting a reality where I'm never the star in my own show.
As happened with the Dark Lady, people don't seem to see me unless they want something from me. They are insensitive to me. I basically end up feeling judged, betrayed and angry. I don't like feeling angry.
I have a tendency to go to the broader, more enlightened viewpoint of seeing that they are just acting FOR me as a means of my avoiding expressing anger.
But that avoidance has kept me from honoring my own experience and their acting job. That keeps me attracting that same old type of betrayal story over and over again. All because I've been afraid of my human self, knowing from the Dark Lady's lifetime how truly dark a human can go.
But the Human Being is just a Costume--a very sensual one.
Those times each of us played the bad person--we dived into the character and immersed so whole-heartedly into the role, from the understanding of what motivated one to behave in such a manner--that we convinced everyone, including ourselves, that that's who we were--period.
And because we played it so well, the "good person" in the play had the opportunity to experience his own shiningly beautiful light even more. What a gift! To be loved so much that someone was willing to risk his own reputation and life-experience in order to let another experience the wonder and beauty of themselves. But it was all JUST AN ACT--on all our parts! Humans are just costumes!
SELF-FORGIVENESS is simply realizing, and embracing, that that wasn't REALLY me!
I acted out a role. And with that realization, all the shackles of guilt, shame and misery are loosened and fall away.
This SELF-FORGIVENESS concept was perhaps the most challenging thing for me to completely grasp. It goes hand-in-hand with learning to unconditionally love oneself. If I can forgive and love all of me, I can forgive and love anyone and everyone else with ease.
This has all been a VERY LIMITED VERSION of REALITY being played out by blind, deeply asleep humans, unaware of who we really are.
I see it as a grand illusion--a virtual reality game. That perspective helps me perceive my reality as more transparent and flexible and flowing; rather than solid, concrete, immovable, stuck. I felt safer making choices then and to allow myself to make mistakes in something less solid.
There really is no such thing as a mistake--it's all simply experience.
In the outer world mirror around me that was ultimately reflecting the conflicted inner me, I'd hear sentiments like:
"I can forgive, but I can't--or won't--forget." This basically means, "I CHOOSE not to forgive."
"God forgives everything, BUT, I can't--or won't." This means the same as, "Some god out there separate from me is capable of doing what I simply CHOOSE not to do."
As long as you make that suggested belief your own truth, some forgiving god "out there" is having way more fun than your human being.
As a result of choosing to not forgive, we find ourselves STUCK in a STORY, playing out a CHARACTER ROLE or IDENTITY that we believe is who we are--for the rest of our lives. And we walk around, limited and suffocated, with the weapons ready, the protective armor on and the guards erected, trying to convince ourselves that we still belong in this world, all the while feelingly believing that we don't deserve to even exist. If you CLOSE YOUR EYES, you can feel this inside of you.
Those above sentiments on forgiving are actually personal CHOICES. We can forgive--unconditionally and compassionately--but many choose not to, and our human minds back up that choice by using all kinds of reasons and justifications. If you really want out of the story, you'll find yourself having to tell your "justifying mind" to "SHUT UP!"
Unforgiving people are actually choosing to continue acting out stories that they often say they hate--regardless of whether they're playing the role of victim or perpetrator. Frankly, if I'm still playing in a story--even though I'm frustrated in it--I'm benefiting from it on some level. I'm liking it.
As long as I understand that I'm choosing to pretend to role-play in any story, I'm never going to be stuck in an identity again.
I can simply step out of the roles that don't feel like much fun for me, while still allowing and honoring the sovereignty of those who continue to play in that game--without judging them.
Everyone outside of me can joyfully experience their realities, and I can enjoy mine without being affected by others' choices. It means my husband and family and loved ones can make choices that I can choose to not affect me. What they do, or how they are, doesn't have to reflect on me. I can rest, finally knowing, deep within, that we're all okay--no matter what transpires. That there is nothing I have to figure out how to fix in this world.
This planet is A SAFE SPACE to EXPERIENCE and DISCOVER ONESELF while RELATING with OTHERS. And I don't need to feel guilty about anything, about stepping back and letting go of trying to control everyone and everything--including myself.
ALLOW yourself to leave any story mid-way.
AUTHENTICALLY FEEL the experience through, without judging how you "think" you "should be."
Be honest--For me, that means ALLOWING myself to FEEL and EXPRESS anger at those who play my betrayers. They don't have to be present.
OBSERVE yourself acting...
I awakened one morning from a dream feeling extremely frustrated and at odds:
I was in a classroom writing down my answer to a one-question essay assignment. The only problem was my handwriting was fading as quickly as I wrote the words down. Suddenly the teacher wanted our answers typed out. I searched all over the classroom, and eventually, the school, trying to find a typewriter that wasn't being used already. I never did find a machine, and to make matters worse, a couple more questions were added to the assignment. The story just worsened and grew more complex, the longer I stayed with it--nothing in it was resolved to my satisfaction or for simple peace of mind.
When Dad was dying, I spent a good portion of those last days, trying to help finish all his unfinished business and relationships and stories in order to help him make his death transition easier and more peaceful. All of us humans naturally want to bring our stories--and our character identities--to perfect happy endings.
And that has been a stumbling block for me in stepping over the threshold into living out my own recent embodied enlightenment as a self-master.
My dream made me aware that I've been trying to finish all the old stories and relationships I played in. I was trying to bring them all to a happy conclusion, and I was still trying to make Penny into a perfect human.
She's a bit special, because it was in the lifetime role of Penny that I'm experiencing the integration of my spiritual divinity and all my other aspects and lifetimes with this one human incarnation. I not only lived out the ascension process (the awakening to self-awareness) on earth, but I also chose to then stay embodied (incarnate) as a self-master. To fore go the traditional human death story.
In the dream, I had all the answers, was writing them down with ease, but the more I tried to complete them according to the rules of my "I'm Just a Little Human" mind (symbolized by the teacher's requirements), the more complicated and frustrating the assignment became for me. In order to "keep me alive," the assignment could never actually be finished--the story couldn't end. My human mind never wanted a resolution because "it thought" that would be the end, the destruction, of Penny.
I have a dream of every community having a local theater -- a place where members can come together and consciously role-play.
So we get more comfortable with immersing into a character role, by AUTHENTICALLY FEELING our way through it WITHOUT JUDGING OURSELVES, and then switching out of it when we've had enough of a particular story.
I'd like everyone to have the opportunity to realize the joy our souls have of playing ALL kinds of PARTS together with SELF-FORGIVENESS, GRATITUDE, COMPASSION, CELEBRATION--and lots of LAUGHTER.
I have a vision where someday each person has realized that we've all just been role-playing together all along, and that our past experiences don't define us, or keep us stuck in a limited identity and genre.
We are ALL SO MUCH MORE than our pasts--and our pasts are SO MUCH MORE than we've understood.
These days I remind myself constantly of these four things:
1. It's all A FLEXIBLE HOLOGRAPHIC REALITY (my body included).
2. There is NO-thing I have to do or finish--or perfect.
3. BREATHE and ALLOW my consciousness (self-awareness) to OPEN and flow and mingle HARMONIOUSLY with all that is, within and without--without thought. Weapons down, armor off...
4. Be honest with myself about how I feel in the experience.
With releasing myself from the role of Penny, I find myself breathing so much more at ease, so much more at home in my own body than I ever was before. The protective armor and all the barriers I PUT in around me to protect myself in what felt like a really tough and harsh world are, one-by-one, dropping away as I become aware that they're there. It's just a matter of re-minding myself to flow it through by being HONEST about myself in the experience. All my old personal demons are being put to rest--with my own gratitude for ALL the parts I played...
Little One--come sing with me!
We have a song, a joyous melody.
Little One, come lift your heart in song--
Giving thanks for ALL parts played,
Whether right or seeming wrong!
Hear the thunder, hear the ROAR--
A celebration like we've never FELT before...
Little One--at last you're free!
Little One, come and dance with me.
It's all right, you've let your story be told,
And in the LIGHT of DAY, behold:
You're a WONDER!
Life's a GIFT!
A celebration of ALL THAT IS!
Though you stumble, though you fall--
When it all is said and done,
All there is IS LOVE!
Everything in my life has manifested in service to me--it's my creation--even the distorted ones. I get betrayed by those I love and admire because it's not appropriate for me to worship or protect or place them higher than myself.
Anger, when I allow it, is a great shaker-upper. It knocks others off the pedestal on which I've placed them--and has us standing on the same level.
I've already created the reality I desire--I'm now experiencing the process of it manifesting for me. It all comes to me...
Everything in my life is here FOR ME! Everything is a gift of experience.
"I am THAT, I am all of that, I am!"
I matter...I am worthy....
We're all quite the characters--actors, that is--role-playing together. These are stories of my awakening, my remembering realization that Home/Heaven is wherever I am. That I am not the puppet on someone else's string. The search is over. I simply FREELY CHOSE to quit searching outside of myself, and realized all my answers have always been within.
Wednesday, August 22, 2018
Saturday, January 13, 2018
The Dance
The Dance
By Penny Lewton Binek
Passion and his beloved Compassion
glide a path together--
sometimes breaking apart,
sometimes framing the other, heart-to-heart--
waxing and waning
'round the floor of the Flagstone Terrace.
They dance through the annals of the ages,
the picture book that is my mind,
to the wildly whirling-twirling,
strangely peaceful dervish
that is my heart,
in rhythm to the song
that is my soul.
Monday, October 23, 2017
Evolving Church Ministries: New Opportunities For Their Communities
I've had the pleasure of recently visiting with friends and relatives from my hometown and surrounding communities, and during our visits one of the subjects was the lack of ministers. One minister is dividing her or his time among three or more communities. I have a neighbor and a niece who are ministers, and through them, I've gained an appreciation of the sacrifices such people make in order to serve their communities. Their job is being on-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for not only the weekly sermon, but they provide other community services during the week, and they are there for times of celebration and times of sorrow. Unless they have another minister to help shoulder the duties, it can get really stressful. These are truly giving people, and they are being expected to "do more with less and less and less."
Do more with less is exactly what I experienced in the business world--the corporate world of manufacturing and packaging. It's not a new idea--the Jewish slaves in Egypt in the time of Moses were expected to produce more bricks for building, and in a shorter time with less raw materials. Their expected quota for the day was raised.
I look at the OLD business bottom-line profit approaches and they don't even make COMMON SENSE! Some employees around here in Minot, an area that enjoyed a financial abundance during a short-lived oil boom, are chastised for not bringing in the money now that they did when the community was feeling flush. When oil prices were at their height, the costs of rent and food were astronomical--a ridiculous gouging of the people who made up our community. I was personally frustrated at the lack of COMMUNITY consciousness in these practises--and it wasn't everyone that was doing it. It was mainly being done by unawakened individuals and companies who thought it was about competition and survival of the fittest. They weren't aware of even looking for another way that might benefit everyone involved.
But that's what we have now--a segment of our world population is either awake or in the process of their awakening, and these individuals are starting to incorporate new, more community-service-based (heart-based) practises in their daily lives and businesses. Others are deep asleep in the old hypnosis of the old ways, and they really aren't open to anything new. There is no judgment here--there is a time and a season...and a profound reason...for everything and everyone, just as they are, under the sun.
While listening to my friends tell about church members filling in to do Sunday services on days that their traveling minister was engaged at another church, it suddenly struck me that the dying church of the old ways was creating a new window of opportunity for its parishioners. People who were passionate about learning more about God and Jesus, and understanding and improving their own lives, were actually reading their Bibles and other books surrounding the stories related there-in, and were stepping up to share their own inner aha moments with other people gathered to hear such profundities!
Now this, my beloved human friends, is the type of interaction with other people that gets me excited! I LOVE being with others who are so willing to share their deepest and highest experiences, and the wisdom and compassion they gain from them--and then are so willing to listen as I share my own with them. These are the most rewarding interactions I have ever taken part in. Conversations surrounding sports and reality TV and gossip or political rants do not interest me in the least. But when someone shares with me something from deep within their heart--realizations that set them free and add sparkle to their eyes--I exult and dance it in for hours and days later.
I can see a new type of ministry emerging from the ashes of the old: I see the rows of pews facing a lectern or an alter turning into a circle of chairs where each person in the circle has something to share that everyone benefits from personally if they are willing to listen. Heck, my dad and my brother, Steve, did ministry work having coffee in a booth at the local restaurant. We can create safe and sacred spaces for ourselves and each other no matter where we are.
With much love and celebration and anticipation,
The Benevolent Rebel
Do more with less is exactly what I experienced in the business world--the corporate world of manufacturing and packaging. It's not a new idea--the Jewish slaves in Egypt in the time of Moses were expected to produce more bricks for building, and in a shorter time with less raw materials. Their expected quota for the day was raised.
I look at the OLD business bottom-line profit approaches and they don't even make COMMON SENSE! Some employees around here in Minot, an area that enjoyed a financial abundance during a short-lived oil boom, are chastised for not bringing in the money now that they did when the community was feeling flush. When oil prices were at their height, the costs of rent and food were astronomical--a ridiculous gouging of the people who made up our community. I was personally frustrated at the lack of COMMUNITY consciousness in these practises--and it wasn't everyone that was doing it. It was mainly being done by unawakened individuals and companies who thought it was about competition and survival of the fittest. They weren't aware of even looking for another way that might benefit everyone involved.
But that's what we have now--a segment of our world population is either awake or in the process of their awakening, and these individuals are starting to incorporate new, more community-service-based (heart-based) practises in their daily lives and businesses. Others are deep asleep in the old hypnosis of the old ways, and they really aren't open to anything new. There is no judgment here--there is a time and a season...and a profound reason...for everything and everyone, just as they are, under the sun.
While listening to my friends tell about church members filling in to do Sunday services on days that their traveling minister was engaged at another church, it suddenly struck me that the dying church of the old ways was creating a new window of opportunity for its parishioners. People who were passionate about learning more about God and Jesus, and understanding and improving their own lives, were actually reading their Bibles and other books surrounding the stories related there-in, and were stepping up to share their own inner aha moments with other people gathered to hear such profundities!
Now this, my beloved human friends, is the type of interaction with other people that gets me excited! I LOVE being with others who are so willing to share their deepest and highest experiences, and the wisdom and compassion they gain from them--and then are so willing to listen as I share my own with them. These are the most rewarding interactions I have ever taken part in. Conversations surrounding sports and reality TV and gossip or political rants do not interest me in the least. But when someone shares with me something from deep within their heart--realizations that set them free and add sparkle to their eyes--I exult and dance it in for hours and days later.
I can see a new type of ministry emerging from the ashes of the old: I see the rows of pews facing a lectern or an alter turning into a circle of chairs where each person in the circle has something to share that everyone benefits from personally if they are willing to listen. Heck, my dad and my brother, Steve, did ministry work having coffee in a booth at the local restaurant. We can create safe and sacred spaces for ourselves and each other no matter where we are.
With much love and celebration and anticipation,
The Benevolent Rebel
Thursday, October 5, 2017
Story of the Moment: An Opportunity or a Limitation?
Open and Allow.
I've realized that every story playing in every moment of my present life is an opportunity for me to OPEN myself to going beyond my old limited perception of the drama in front of me. My perception is everything when it comes to manifesting the life I desire. My perception is what determines what flavor of consciousness I radiate out to the energies that serve me in then manifesting the realities I experience.
My Life Is a Gift, Not a Test.
Viewing life from the perspective of it being a gift rather than a proving-ground of self-worth is a key perception in this game.
In realizing that I could CHOOSE to view a seeming dilemma as A GIFT of an opportunity to go beyond an old story rather than being stuck in a same-old, same-old experience--yet again--I felt a blossoming shift in my consciousness and in my personal energy field. I felt my braced shoulders and body loosen up and open up. I felt myself take a deep breath of ease and a smile touch my face.
I have an opportunity to enjoy a trip to another beautiful state, but I felt stuck in feelings of self-doubt, aloneness, and possible failure, with a niggling aspect of lack of abundance. I felt obligation and hurt at past betrayal stories. None of these were really how I personally feel. They were just old and sticky stories cycling back around to see if I wanted to make them mine. They were past experienced possibilities that I could make my truth, my reality. They were haunting me, "Pick me! Pick Me!" they said as they made smirky faces at me.
It was mucking me up. I was feeling stuck, closed in, unable to make any choice with a feeling of graceful ease. And the future date was looming closer and closer without a feeling of resolution other than regretfully having to decline the invitation. I sat on the couch sipping my cappuccino, allowing myself to feel into all of it--all those icky, frustrated old poor-little-me stories. And then it hit me.
Every story is merely a SUGGESTION of potentials I can choose or not choose to make my own experience. Every story is an opportunity to OPEN and ALLOW myself ease and grace in receiving the field of potential energies that serve me. I don't have to plan the logistics--figure out how to make it unfold. I just pick a flavor--like ice cream--something I feel I might enjoy.
I just OPEN myself, my self-awareness, and allow myself to feel at ease; instead of bracing myself in the old way, trying to manipulate and survive what feels like a landscape of emotional and physical landmines out to get me if I make one false move or choice.
Be Grateful--For the Opportunity.
My life is a multitude of opportunities: Replace all my old fears surrounding it with overall gratitude..
View all my stories with GRATITUDE. Instead of trying to figure out how to handle a situation and myself--simply view EVERY MOMENT and EVERY STORY as an OPPORTUNITY to open myself up to receive a GIFT of a life of EASE and GRACE. No weapons wielded offensively or defensively, no armor or protective barriers needed.
Simply open and give heartfelt thanks for the opportunities--even the opportunities clothed as Facebook whines, tantrums, tirades and power games. I have the whole pie, and many pies to play with, instead of just the Little Human sliver I once thought was all that I was. That's a whole lot to be grateful for...and all I have to do is OPEN and ALLOW myself to receive it. No judgment necessary.
I've realized that every story playing in every moment of my present life is an opportunity for me to OPEN myself to going beyond my old limited perception of the drama in front of me. My perception is everything when it comes to manifesting the life I desire. My perception is what determines what flavor of consciousness I radiate out to the energies that serve me in then manifesting the realities I experience.
My Life Is a Gift, Not a Test.
Viewing life from the perspective of it being a gift rather than a proving-ground of self-worth is a key perception in this game.
In realizing that I could CHOOSE to view a seeming dilemma as A GIFT of an opportunity to go beyond an old story rather than being stuck in a same-old, same-old experience--yet again--I felt a blossoming shift in my consciousness and in my personal energy field. I felt my braced shoulders and body loosen up and open up. I felt myself take a deep breath of ease and a smile touch my face.
I have an opportunity to enjoy a trip to another beautiful state, but I felt stuck in feelings of self-doubt, aloneness, and possible failure, with a niggling aspect of lack of abundance. I felt obligation and hurt at past betrayal stories. None of these were really how I personally feel. They were just old and sticky stories cycling back around to see if I wanted to make them mine. They were past experienced possibilities that I could make my truth, my reality. They were haunting me, "Pick me! Pick Me!" they said as they made smirky faces at me.
It was mucking me up. I was feeling stuck, closed in, unable to make any choice with a feeling of graceful ease. And the future date was looming closer and closer without a feeling of resolution other than regretfully having to decline the invitation. I sat on the couch sipping my cappuccino, allowing myself to feel into all of it--all those icky, frustrated old poor-little-me stories. And then it hit me.
Every story is merely a SUGGESTION of potentials I can choose or not choose to make my own experience. Every story is an opportunity to OPEN and ALLOW myself ease and grace in receiving the field of potential energies that serve me. I don't have to plan the logistics--figure out how to make it unfold. I just pick a flavor--like ice cream--something I feel I might enjoy.
I just OPEN myself, my self-awareness, and allow myself to feel at ease; instead of bracing myself in the old way, trying to manipulate and survive what feels like a landscape of emotional and physical landmines out to get me if I make one false move or choice.
Be Grateful--For the Opportunity.
My life is a multitude of opportunities: Replace all my old fears surrounding it with overall gratitude..
View all my stories with GRATITUDE. Instead of trying to figure out how to handle a situation and myself--simply view EVERY MOMENT and EVERY STORY as an OPPORTUNITY to open myself up to receive a GIFT of a life of EASE and GRACE. No weapons wielded offensively or defensively, no armor or protective barriers needed.
Simply open and give heartfelt thanks for the opportunities--even the opportunities clothed as Facebook whines, tantrums, tirades and power games. I have the whole pie, and many pies to play with, instead of just the Little Human sliver I once thought was all that I was. That's a whole lot to be grateful for...and all I have to do is OPEN and ALLOW myself to receive it. No judgment necessary.
Tuesday, September 19, 2017
Walking On...Beyond Death With Steve, Part III
An Invitation
I've been holding off on posting this Part III of Walking On: Beyond Death With Steve. I've just been adding anecdotes and dreams I've had about him since he crossed over the Veil of Forgetting. I chose to walk beyond the old concepts surrounding death simply by keeping myself open to potentials most of us humans haven't realized were even possible. I'm allowing it to simply unfold, trusting there is a new way. Do I have frustrating, missing-him-terribly moments? Yes! But I have an unshakable trust in myself that it will all work out. Just keep yourself open, Pen, and allow yourself to receive all the gifts that come your way in this.
Steve often met people for the first time who'd tell him that they knew him--they recognized him as a character in their dreams at night. He wouldn't recall any of it, and was frustrated that he couldn't. He usually woke up nauseated. But he got a kick out of hearing the stories from friends and acquaintances, and then sharing them with me.
We both desired for the two of us to be able to travel and meet in the other dimensions. It finally happened the week he helped us move to Minot nearly eleven years ago. I remembered grinning ear to ear and joyfully greeting him in my dreams that night, "We finally did it!" I made a note to myself to remember it in the morning. I did actually recall it (a grand-feeling feat for me), but Steve once again didn't remember a thing--he just awoke dizzy and nauseated and nearly fell out of his bed.
Note: Dizziness and a bit of nausea are often symptoms of traveling across many dimensions or realities--nothing is wrong with you. You're just not accustomed to the awareness of doing it, and so there is a resistance--a bracing of oneself. The more one RELAXES and ALLOWS it by moving through one's fear about it, the easier and more graceful the experience becomes.
Also: When you want to leave a reality or dimension, SIMPLY CHOOSE this reality, and you're here instantly. You need to know you can't get stuck, not really. Just choose this one, and you're back to a place you know how to navigate as a human.
I've been prone to motion sickness most of my life. And then Adamus Saint-Germain talked about how we, as pinpoints of conscious awareness, don't actually move at all. We are eternal and stationary. Even when we seem to have bodies that move and sense--that's actually energy in the forms of space and time (aka Bon) flowing in patterns to us, and through us. It's basically just like sitting in an omnitheater, in a stationary seat with a surrounding screen of flowing vistas of mountainous peaks and canyons of treacherous turns, where it feels like one false move on my part would have me falling and crashing. Only I can't actually fall or crash because I'm the projector and the light--it's all just a very sensual experience.
Last time I flew, knowing that I was stationary and that the turbulence of the airplane I was on was just energies flowing around and through me, that I really wasn't locked in a moving vehicle traveling through air space--it was the first time I didn't experience motion sickness while flying. It used to take me the rest of the day and a good night's sleep to recover from airplane travel that was bumpy.
I may prove myself to be a complete and utter fool, but I realize I don't care about that. I'm not hurting anyone. This is my gift of a life. This is my reality to manifest and play in. I had to step away from Facebook for a bit because so many of our loved ones are crossing over the Veil and I feel my energies, out of old habit, rush into their stories, holding their pain. It's so seductive that I feel myself caught up in the grief, the loss, the utter sadness--and in some cases, the guilt--before I realize I'm doing it. It made it difficult to keep myself open and the energies flowing.
So, I invite those of you who choose to open yourselves up to connecting with Steve and your other loved ones--humans and pets on the other side of the Veil--please feel free to share your stories with me. I will treasure them. Remember to watch for the simple things, the subtle things...
In the days and months following Steve's transition, amid the bouts of grief and my grappling to keep myself open to see all of this through in a new way, I've experienced, I just realized, quite a number of reassuring winks, dreams, and reminders that all is well:
It--everything--comes to you.
The day after Steve left his body, Laurie and I had lunch at Ruby Tuesdays in Bismarck. I chose to eat there in memory of having a meal with Steve at the one in Minot. While perusing the drinks menu, I'd noted the raspberry lemonade felt appealing, but didn't order it. I didn't say anything about it out loud to our waitress. I just went with water. As Laurie and I were enjoying our salads, our waitress came by and offered us a raspberry lemonade that she'd accidentally made for someone else. Immediately, I remembered Adamus Saint-Germain devoting a whole shoud, using a simple cup of coffee as an example, to reminding me that everything comes to me. It comes to you...keep yourself open...and just let yourself receive it...
The hawk.
Steve was a school bus driver for a number of years, and along one of his routes he told about hawks perching on a line of fence posts on a regular basis when he passed by. When we buried his ashes on our hill on the farm, a hawk circled overhead nearby.
Another hawk called out to us and perched in a branch almost in reach of us as I was walking around Oak Park in Minot with my Reiki master friend, Brenda. I was telling her about Steve's music and the way that his songs first came to him in other languages which later would translate into English. Of the losses I experienced, Steve's music was perhaps one of the greatest. When he stayed with Kelly and me, I used to feel myself shift into other dimensions while he played and sang. Brenda is aware that birds and animals that appear on our paths hold significance, so it was wonderful to have her witness and acknowledge his presence with me.
Later on in the summer, another hawk perched in the cottonwood tree in our back yard while I was out with the cats. I had been talking to Steve while sitting on the back steps when it just flew in. This bird had a grand presence--so much so that I gathered my three kitties and put them inside. It stayed for a couple of hours. I doubt it would have harmed my cats, but I wanted to enjoy its presence without any fear. It was easier to keep myself open that way.
My dreams of Steve.
One of my favorite dreams is the one where I approached this woman sitting in a corner booth at a restaurant. She was offering her condolences at the death of my brother. But I was looking at her, inwardly shaking my head. There she was, telling me how sorry she was at the loss of my brother when said brother, Steve, was sitting right next to her in the same booth, eyes dancing with laughter, acting especially clever and silly, widely grinning, sporting a goatee! I can still hear him belly-laughing at me with that one.
In another dream I remember reuniting joyfully with Steve and Dad. I actually walked into Dad's arms and soaked in a hug.
On the morning of January 12, 2017, I awoke remembering this part of a dream: Steve had returned to this Earth realm and he was playing his guitar and singing all the songs he'd written while he was incarnate here--all the songs I once grieved had been lost into obscurity due to his transition that humans call death.
A synchronistic encounter.
Steve and I shared a love of our local libraries and reading. I had an odd, yet sweet and profound experience at the library last fall. I was perusing the new paperbacks shelves when I realized someone was standing close behind me. I turned to acknowledge the person and to apologize for hogging the space, when I realized he was talking to me and referring to the train going by right outside the window. He told me his father drove the trains in India, that he was born in Bombay, and that later in his youth his family moved to a village of 500,000 in the Himalayas.
He continued on and recited to me a condensed version of his life story, opening his wallet to show me a picture of his American wife and of his daughter. He and his wife met at a university in Houston, Texas. After their three children had been raised, his wife's work allowed her and him to travel throughout China and Asia. After 6 years abroad, he asked her to allow them to return home to their kids and families in the US. She flew back home with him, got him settled, and then returned to China alone, where she's been ever since. Her sons even tried to get a court order to make her stay in the US. Of course, the judge ruled in her favor, while reminding her that the reason her sons did so was simply because they wanted her near.
The gentleman ended his story by opening his wallet one last time to show me his name on his driver's license: "Jayant." He still awaits his wife's return some day, and he said his name reminds him that his hope is not lost: "Jay" means "Victory"; and "ant" means "in the end."
I've been holding off on posting this Part III of Walking On: Beyond Death With Steve. I've just been adding anecdotes and dreams I've had about him since he crossed over the Veil of Forgetting. I chose to walk beyond the old concepts surrounding death simply by keeping myself open to potentials most of us humans haven't realized were even possible. I'm allowing it to simply unfold, trusting there is a new way. Do I have frustrating, missing-him-terribly moments? Yes! But I have an unshakable trust in myself that it will all work out. Just keep yourself open, Pen, and allow yourself to receive all the gifts that come your way in this.
Steve often met people for the first time who'd tell him that they knew him--they recognized him as a character in their dreams at night. He wouldn't recall any of it, and was frustrated that he couldn't. He usually woke up nauseated. But he got a kick out of hearing the stories from friends and acquaintances, and then sharing them with me.
We both desired for the two of us to be able to travel and meet in the other dimensions. It finally happened the week he helped us move to Minot nearly eleven years ago. I remembered grinning ear to ear and joyfully greeting him in my dreams that night, "We finally did it!" I made a note to myself to remember it in the morning. I did actually recall it (a grand-feeling feat for me), but Steve once again didn't remember a thing--he just awoke dizzy and nauseated and nearly fell out of his bed.
Note: Dizziness and a bit of nausea are often symptoms of traveling across many dimensions or realities--nothing is wrong with you. You're just not accustomed to the awareness of doing it, and so there is a resistance--a bracing of oneself. The more one RELAXES and ALLOWS it by moving through one's fear about it, the easier and more graceful the experience becomes.
Also: When you want to leave a reality or dimension, SIMPLY CHOOSE this reality, and you're here instantly. You need to know you can't get stuck, not really. Just choose this one, and you're back to a place you know how to navigate as a human.
I've been prone to motion sickness most of my life. And then Adamus Saint-Germain talked about how we, as pinpoints of conscious awareness, don't actually move at all. We are eternal and stationary. Even when we seem to have bodies that move and sense--that's actually energy in the forms of space and time (aka Bon) flowing in patterns to us, and through us. It's basically just like sitting in an omnitheater, in a stationary seat with a surrounding screen of flowing vistas of mountainous peaks and canyons of treacherous turns, where it feels like one false move on my part would have me falling and crashing. Only I can't actually fall or crash because I'm the projector and the light--it's all just a very sensual experience.
Last time I flew, knowing that I was stationary and that the turbulence of the airplane I was on was just energies flowing around and through me, that I really wasn't locked in a moving vehicle traveling through air space--it was the first time I didn't experience motion sickness while flying. It used to take me the rest of the day and a good night's sleep to recover from airplane travel that was bumpy.
I may prove myself to be a complete and utter fool, but I realize I don't care about that. I'm not hurting anyone. This is my gift of a life. This is my reality to manifest and play in. I had to step away from Facebook for a bit because so many of our loved ones are crossing over the Veil and I feel my energies, out of old habit, rush into their stories, holding their pain. It's so seductive that I feel myself caught up in the grief, the loss, the utter sadness--and in some cases, the guilt--before I realize I'm doing it. It made it difficult to keep myself open and the energies flowing.
So, I invite those of you who choose to open yourselves up to connecting with Steve and your other loved ones--humans and pets on the other side of the Veil--please feel free to share your stories with me. I will treasure them. Remember to watch for the simple things, the subtle things...
In the days and months following Steve's transition, amid the bouts of grief and my grappling to keep myself open to see all of this through in a new way, I've experienced, I just realized, quite a number of reassuring winks, dreams, and reminders that all is well:
It--everything--comes to you.
The day after Steve left his body, Laurie and I had lunch at Ruby Tuesdays in Bismarck. I chose to eat there in memory of having a meal with Steve at the one in Minot. While perusing the drinks menu, I'd noted the raspberry lemonade felt appealing, but didn't order it. I didn't say anything about it out loud to our waitress. I just went with water. As Laurie and I were enjoying our salads, our waitress came by and offered us a raspberry lemonade that she'd accidentally made for someone else. Immediately, I remembered Adamus Saint-Germain devoting a whole shoud, using a simple cup of coffee as an example, to reminding me that everything comes to me. It comes to you...keep yourself open...and just let yourself receive it...
The hawk.
Steve was a school bus driver for a number of years, and along one of his routes he told about hawks perching on a line of fence posts on a regular basis when he passed by. When we buried his ashes on our hill on the farm, a hawk circled overhead nearby.
Another hawk called out to us and perched in a branch almost in reach of us as I was walking around Oak Park in Minot with my Reiki master friend, Brenda. I was telling her about Steve's music and the way that his songs first came to him in other languages which later would translate into English. Of the losses I experienced, Steve's music was perhaps one of the greatest. When he stayed with Kelly and me, I used to feel myself shift into other dimensions while he played and sang. Brenda is aware that birds and animals that appear on our paths hold significance, so it was wonderful to have her witness and acknowledge his presence with me.
Later on in the summer, another hawk perched in the cottonwood tree in our back yard while I was out with the cats. I had been talking to Steve while sitting on the back steps when it just flew in. This bird had a grand presence--so much so that I gathered my three kitties and put them inside. It stayed for a couple of hours. I doubt it would have harmed my cats, but I wanted to enjoy its presence without any fear. It was easier to keep myself open that way.
My dreams of Steve.
One of my favorite dreams is the one where I approached this woman sitting in a corner booth at a restaurant. She was offering her condolences at the death of my brother. But I was looking at her, inwardly shaking my head. There she was, telling me how sorry she was at the loss of my brother when said brother, Steve, was sitting right next to her in the same booth, eyes dancing with laughter, acting especially clever and silly, widely grinning, sporting a goatee! I can still hear him belly-laughing at me with that one.
In another dream I remember reuniting joyfully with Steve and Dad. I actually walked into Dad's arms and soaked in a hug.
On the morning of January 12, 2017, I awoke remembering this part of a dream: Steve had returned to this Earth realm and he was playing his guitar and singing all the songs he'd written while he was incarnate here--all the songs I once grieved had been lost into obscurity due to his transition that humans call death.
A synchronistic encounter.
Steve and I shared a love of our local libraries and reading. I had an odd, yet sweet and profound experience at the library last fall. I was perusing the new paperbacks shelves when I realized someone was standing close behind me. I turned to acknowledge the person and to apologize for hogging the space, when I realized he was talking to me and referring to the train going by right outside the window. He told me his father drove the trains in India, that he was born in Bombay, and that later in his youth his family moved to a village of 500,000 in the Himalayas.
He continued on and recited to me a condensed version of his life story, opening his wallet to show me a picture of his American wife and of his daughter. He and his wife met at a university in Houston, Texas. After their three children had been raised, his wife's work allowed her and him to travel throughout China and Asia. After 6 years abroad, he asked her to allow them to return home to their kids and families in the US. She flew back home with him, got him settled, and then returned to China alone, where she's been ever since. Her sons even tried to get a court order to make her stay in the US. Of course, the judge ruled in her favor, while reminding her that the reason her sons did so was simply because they wanted her near.
The gentleman ended his story by opening his wallet one last time to show me his name on his driver's license: "Jayant." He still awaits his wife's return some day, and he said his name reminds him that his hope is not lost: "Jay" means "Victory"; and "ant" means "in the end."
I admit, it threw me for a few days until I remembered to ask myself what gift he was bearing me...and then it was so clearly and wonderfully there!!! Steve, who loved the library, had his kind messenger deliver my reminder to allow for the something grander to unfold: "Victory in the end."
Reminders that pass through my mind, helping me to smile and keep myself open.
"It all works out in the end, and if it hasn't worked out, then it isn't the end yet."--The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
"Can you allow the twists and turns in your life and allow the grander something to unfold?"--Adamus Saint-Germain
"Just relax! It all happens naturally...Anding and Allowing are the tools..."--Adamus Saint-Germain
"It comes to you."--Adamus Saint-Germain
"You never did anything wrong. Nobody ever did anything wrong. Not really."--Tobias
"Open and Allow..."--Adamus Saint-Germain
My realization about death and perception in my own experiences.
This is how dense the old mass consciousness of humanity is surrounding death: I've been flying and jumping and staying suspended in the air in my dreams again. I've had many of these types of dreams throughout my life, but I always just wrote them off as just dreams--I didn't view them as real. I have had both Mom and Dad (who died in 2001 and 2003) return to life in my dreams, but I wasn't allowing myself to celebrate and fully enjoy being with them again. Because my HUMAN MIND, which believes this reality where they are dead and long buried is the only true reality, kept jumping ahead into grief and deep, deep sadness. I felt myself braced to lose them to death right away. It totally skewed and distorted my very real interaction with them. I had them--huggable, touchable--right there with me, but I was in a deep state of depression at losing them again, believing it was coming at any moment.
All my loved ones keep appearing in my dream states, but I haven't yet had them show up in this reality, and now I understand why. The density of human mass consciousness and its systematic belief in death here doesn't keep itself open to that possibility. Most of humanity believes that dead is dead, and that we can't interact with those who have left their bodies--and this deeply felt belief keeps us imprisoned in the death story ILLUSION.
We have friends, loved ones, acquaintances and strangers walk in and out of our lives all the time--some of whom we don't see for many months or years--but when we see them we don't even question the reality of their existence with us unless we've been told that they died in the interim.
People pass in and out of this singular--my Earthly dimensional reality--all the time, and when they are gone from my physical presence they travel in dimensions I'm not aware of or even in. Yet I trust in their existence--I absolutely trust that they are alive, even if I don't see or hear or feel them in the usual sense.
Steve sometimes appears in my dreams, and then suddenly I don't perceive him for months. But this is exactly what is happening with my other brothers and sisters who are currently "alive." I love and miss them, too, when we're apart--but I don't get seduced into a deep and mournful depression surrounding their absence. I don't question or doubt their being alive. I am open to seeing them again, hugging them--and so when they appear in my reality, I celebrate and enjoy our time together while I have it, until the next time we get together.
Sometimes the possibility of death gets used by humans as a means to control others.
"You're going to feel really guilty if you don't do what I want you to do, and then I up and die before we get together again."
That's a power play--holding one's possible death over another--and it initially triggers me to get ticked off with the person doing it. But when I step back and allow myself to see we're just role-playing out a fictitious act together, I find myself grinning a bit and chuckling to myself at the funny story we have going.
When I feelingly allow myself to move through that deep inner fear to the other side of it--that this time might be our last together, that someone might die before we meet again--well, there's a light at the end of this old death tunnel story. The mourning and guilt tentacles loosen their hold on me.There is a burden-lifting freedom in realizing that I have never done, nor could do, anything truly wrong. That NO ONE has done, or will do, anything wrong. It's all just an act on all our parts.
Death is just an illusion.
Ever since my mom crossed over in the fall of 2001, I've remembered the book of Job in the Old Testament. Job lost everyone and everything. In the end, though, his abundant life and all his friends and loved ones were restored. He truly hadn't lost anything, but he had gained a great deal of WISDOM and COMPASSION from all his "I'm just a Little Human" experiences.
We are divine spirits joyfully playing in HUMAN COSTUMES.
It's all just a big fat "Let's Pretend" story that I can allow myself to be released from at any point. Just because a loved one's death was a potential I experienced in the past doesn't mean I can't transcend the linearity of time and space here--for my loved ones are very much eternally alive and well! I just need to remain open to perceiving them and enjoying their company when they come to me, however they come to me.
And so it is...
Related Posts:
Walking On...Beyond Death With Steve
Walking On...Beyond Death With Steve, Part II
Steve's Legacy of Songs: Finding Your Own Words
Reminders that pass through my mind, helping me to smile and keep myself open.
"It all works out in the end, and if it hasn't worked out, then it isn't the end yet."--The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
"Can you allow the twists and turns in your life and allow the grander something to unfold?"--Adamus Saint-Germain
"Just relax! It all happens naturally...Anding and Allowing are the tools..."--Adamus Saint-Germain
"It comes to you."--Adamus Saint-Germain
"You never did anything wrong. Nobody ever did anything wrong. Not really."--Tobias
"Open and Allow..."--Adamus Saint-Germain
My realization about death and perception in my own experiences.
This is how dense the old mass consciousness of humanity is surrounding death: I've been flying and jumping and staying suspended in the air in my dreams again. I've had many of these types of dreams throughout my life, but I always just wrote them off as just dreams--I didn't view them as real. I have had both Mom and Dad (who died in 2001 and 2003) return to life in my dreams, but I wasn't allowing myself to celebrate and fully enjoy being with them again. Because my HUMAN MIND, which believes this reality where they are dead and long buried is the only true reality, kept jumping ahead into grief and deep, deep sadness. I felt myself braced to lose them to death right away. It totally skewed and distorted my very real interaction with them. I had them--huggable, touchable--right there with me, but I was in a deep state of depression at losing them again, believing it was coming at any moment.
All my loved ones keep appearing in my dream states, but I haven't yet had them show up in this reality, and now I understand why. The density of human mass consciousness and its systematic belief in death here doesn't keep itself open to that possibility. Most of humanity believes that dead is dead, and that we can't interact with those who have left their bodies--and this deeply felt belief keeps us imprisoned in the death story ILLUSION.
We have friends, loved ones, acquaintances and strangers walk in and out of our lives all the time--some of whom we don't see for many months or years--but when we see them we don't even question the reality of their existence with us unless we've been told that they died in the interim.
People pass in and out of this singular--my Earthly dimensional reality--all the time, and when they are gone from my physical presence they travel in dimensions I'm not aware of or even in. Yet I trust in their existence--I absolutely trust that they are alive, even if I don't see or hear or feel them in the usual sense.
Steve sometimes appears in my dreams, and then suddenly I don't perceive him for months. But this is exactly what is happening with my other brothers and sisters who are currently "alive." I love and miss them, too, when we're apart--but I don't get seduced into a deep and mournful depression surrounding their absence. I don't question or doubt their being alive. I am open to seeing them again, hugging them--and so when they appear in my reality, I celebrate and enjoy our time together while I have it, until the next time we get together.
Sometimes the possibility of death gets used by humans as a means to control others.
"You're going to feel really guilty if you don't do what I want you to do, and then I up and die before we get together again."
That's a power play--holding one's possible death over another--and it initially triggers me to get ticked off with the person doing it. But when I step back and allow myself to see we're just role-playing out a fictitious act together, I find myself grinning a bit and chuckling to myself at the funny story we have going.
When I feelingly allow myself to move through that deep inner fear to the other side of it--that this time might be our last together, that someone might die before we meet again--well, there's a light at the end of this old death tunnel story. The mourning and guilt tentacles loosen their hold on me.There is a burden-lifting freedom in realizing that I have never done, nor could do, anything truly wrong. That NO ONE has done, or will do, anything wrong. It's all just an act on all our parts.
Death is just an illusion.
Ever since my mom crossed over in the fall of 2001, I've remembered the book of Job in the Old Testament. Job lost everyone and everything. In the end, though, his abundant life and all his friends and loved ones were restored. He truly hadn't lost anything, but he had gained a great deal of WISDOM and COMPASSION from all his "I'm just a Little Human" experiences.
We are divine spirits joyfully playing in HUMAN COSTUMES.
It's all just a big fat "Let's Pretend" story that I can allow myself to be released from at any point. Just because a loved one's death was a potential I experienced in the past doesn't mean I can't transcend the linearity of time and space here--for my loved ones are very much eternally alive and well! I just need to remain open to perceiving them and enjoying their company when they come to me, however they come to me.
And so it is...
Related Posts:
Walking On...Beyond Death With Steve
Walking On...Beyond Death With Steve, Part II
Steve's Legacy of Songs: Finding Your Own Words
Sunday, March 12, 2017
Steve's Legacy of Songs: Finding Your Own Words
When I was standing on the hilltop this past June, as we buried my brother Steve's ashes, this song of his, "Blow, Oh Wind" kept flowing through my mind and heart. I don't have a recording of it, but I remember it because he always invited me to sing it along with him, even though I hadn't found my singing voice yet. Someday we'll sing it. I just can't do it yet--but I wanted to share the simple and beautiful lyrics. This is music that came to him in the 1980s, which shows how far ahead of his time he was. He often admitted that the lyrics became more profound for him as the years passed. More and more gems of wisdom revealed themselves as our experiences grew. You really don't know life until you live it out for yourself, do you?
I guess, Steve and I would both agree, that one of the most precious gifts we were given in our journeys was when others helped us find our own words, to find that unique way that we could express what we each really felt and knew deep within. It's not nearly as fun memorizing and quoting other people's profound thoughts because that's not your personal expression. I generally don't recall quotes by other people even when they do resonate, but I do remember my own and I apply them all the time.
So, if there is anything that I could give you, it would be to help you to find your own means of self expression, to find your own words...
Blow, Oh Wind!
Song and Lyrics by Steven Richard Lewton
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken hearts away, away...
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken dreams, I pray.
Whatever happened to the love that we once shared?
Like two links in a chain, no weakness there?
Little by little, the tide breaks away the shore,
And the sands of time become an ocean floor.
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken hearts away, away...
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken dreams, I pray.
What do we do now, Love, let the sands of time wear us thin?
Or build a new foundation on a rock that won't cave in?
Let's stop this raging river before it tears our lives apart,
And build again that lighthouse in our hearts.
I guess, Steve and I would both agree, that one of the most precious gifts we were given in our journeys was when others helped us find our own words, to find that unique way that we could express what we each really felt and knew deep within. It's not nearly as fun memorizing and quoting other people's profound thoughts because that's not your personal expression. I generally don't recall quotes by other people even when they do resonate, but I do remember my own and I apply them all the time.
So, if there is anything that I could give you, it would be to help you to find your own means of self expression, to find your own words...
Blow, Oh Wind!
Song and Lyrics by Steven Richard Lewton
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken hearts away, away...
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken dreams, I pray.
Whatever happened to the love that we once shared?
Like two links in a chain, no weakness there?
Little by little, the tide breaks away the shore,
And the sands of time become an ocean floor.
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken hearts away, away...
Blow, oh-oh, oh-oh wind--
Blow these broken dreams, I pray.
What do we do now, Love, let the sands of time wear us thin?
Or build a new foundation on a rock that won't cave in?
Let's stop this raging river before it tears our lives apart,
And build again that lighthouse in our hearts.
Let's light again that candle in our hearts...
Related Posts:
Walking On: Beyond Death With Steve
Walking On: Beyond Death With Steve, Part II
Related Posts:
Walking On: Beyond Death With Steve
Walking On: Beyond Death With Steve, Part II
Saturday, January 28, 2017
I Am the Alpha and the Omega In All My Relationships
How many Consciously Aware Beings does it take to change a world? Only one--myself.
And all those scary corrupt public officials, bankers, abusers--essentially the monsters and demons I'd been fighting with back in my conspiracy-fighting days? They were just bits of plasma role-playing for me, the Creator of my own world, aspects of myself that got lost in her/his human experiences. It was just for a limited time, though, not forever.
Whatever I put out ultimately returns to me--that is why CLEAR LOVE will not tolerate being abused by another being, because the abuser is the ultimate last victim receiving his own abuse. It will come back to him many times more intense, and distorted, if it isn't stopped at the first victim. I am the Alpha and the Omega--I am the origin of the consciousness radiating out that determines how the energies serving me return to me and manifest in my life.
This is why it's important for the victim to say "No more! I am done with this story of energy stealing! We are done with this story, you and I! We are done! I set us both FREE!" It's the most compassionate thing a victim can do--set a boundary of love.
Because whatever I put out ultimately returns to me, even across multiple lifetimes. If I am experiencing abuse of myself--playing the part of victim--I was the creator of that abuse that I'm struggling with. It originated with some life expression of my soul, and as such I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN NEUTRALIZE IT. I am the only one who can choose to end that story by setting boundaries of love in which I no longer allow myself or anyone else to harm me.
Whatever I do to another outside of me, I am ultimately doing that to myself...
This is why it's of utmost importance that I accept and love all of me first, so it's easier for me to accept and have compassion for all others. It's not choosing love of another over oneself or vice versa--it's "and," it's both.
Many modern day religions are teaching that you're selfish and narcissistic if you love yourself. "That's no way to be!" they say.
So be kind to oneself...and...all others.
If you're harming others, you're essentially hurting yourself...and...if you're harming yourself, you're hurting others.
The key point in both of those is to be kind to all. I know from personal experience that loving and accepting all aspects of myself first makes it easy for me to compassionately, hands-off accept all others in my life. I allow us all our freedom to be.
To Judge Is To Limit.
"What goes around, comes around."--that's pretty much karma. "I am the alpha and the omega--I am the beginning and the end." I am the ultimate recipient of what I put out.
The funny thing about that karma phrase, though, is that the person often using it is making a judgment about another person, and they aren't aware of it. It's like wishing another person ill, basically casting a spell at the other person, and that act of power eventually returns to the one making the judgment.
"Judge not lest you be judged the same." When we judge someone else, we're actually judging our self. We're limiting our self.
We can dislike what someone else chooses without condemning them, without pointing fingers of blame. "That's a way to choose to be...and...I don't like that so I'm making a different choice." This is an example of using the tools of "And" & "Allowing."
Love Sets Boundaries
CLEAR LOVE will not tolerate being persecuted and abused. Clear love steps out of the story and sees that it was all just an acting job on all parts.
The sexual energy virus--a victim who allows the perpetuation of her abuse is as much the abuser as the one play-acting her persecutor. Just step out of the role-playing.
The ultimate act of playing Victim is pretending others' choices affect you--that is playing in the power game.
"They" can make all the freedom-nullifying laws "they" choose, but if you're standing in your own sovereignty claiming your own world, your own freedom--you can live out your own FREE life, and those playing in POWER won't even see you. Do NOT compromise or negotiate with them because that is playing in power. Stand within yourself! BE free!
And all those scary corrupt public officials, bankers, abusers--essentially the monsters and demons I'd been fighting with back in my conspiracy-fighting days? They were just bits of plasma role-playing for me, the Creator of my own world, aspects of myself that got lost in her/his human experiences. It was just for a limited time, though, not forever.
Whatever I put out ultimately returns to me--that is why CLEAR LOVE will not tolerate being abused by another being, because the abuser is the ultimate last victim receiving his own abuse. It will come back to him many times more intense, and distorted, if it isn't stopped at the first victim. I am the Alpha and the Omega--I am the origin of the consciousness radiating out that determines how the energies serving me return to me and manifest in my life.
This is why it's important for the victim to say "No more! I am done with this story of energy stealing! We are done with this story, you and I! We are done! I set us both FREE!" It's the most compassionate thing a victim can do--set a boundary of love.
Because whatever I put out ultimately returns to me, even across multiple lifetimes. If I am experiencing abuse of myself--playing the part of victim--I was the creator of that abuse that I'm struggling with. It originated with some life expression of my soul, and as such I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN NEUTRALIZE IT. I am the only one who can choose to end that story by setting boundaries of love in which I no longer allow myself or anyone else to harm me.
Whatever I do to another outside of me, I am ultimately doing that to myself...
This is why it's of utmost importance that I accept and love all of me first, so it's easier for me to accept and have compassion for all others. It's not choosing love of another over oneself or vice versa--it's "and," it's both.
Many modern day religions are teaching that you're selfish and narcissistic if you love yourself. "That's no way to be!" they say.
So be kind to oneself...and...all others.
If you're harming others, you're essentially hurting yourself...and...if you're harming yourself, you're hurting others.
The key point in both of those is to be kind to all. I know from personal experience that loving and accepting all aspects of myself first makes it easy for me to compassionately, hands-off accept all others in my life. I allow us all our freedom to be.
To Judge Is To Limit.
"What goes around, comes around."--that's pretty much karma. "I am the alpha and the omega--I am the beginning and the end." I am the ultimate recipient of what I put out.
The funny thing about that karma phrase, though, is that the person often using it is making a judgment about another person, and they aren't aware of it. It's like wishing another person ill, basically casting a spell at the other person, and that act of power eventually returns to the one making the judgment.
"Judge not lest you be judged the same." When we judge someone else, we're actually judging our self. We're limiting our self.
We can dislike what someone else chooses without condemning them, without pointing fingers of blame. "That's a way to choose to be...and...I don't like that so I'm making a different choice." This is an example of using the tools of "And" & "Allowing."
Love Sets Boundaries
CLEAR LOVE will not tolerate being persecuted and abused. Clear love steps out of the story and sees that it was all just an acting job on all parts.
The sexual energy virus--a victim who allows the perpetuation of her abuse is as much the abuser as the one play-acting her persecutor. Just step out of the role-playing.
The ultimate act of playing Victim is pretending others' choices affect you--that is playing in the power game.
"They" can make all the freedom-nullifying laws "they" choose, but if you're standing in your own sovereignty claiming your own world, your own freedom--you can live out your own FREE life, and those playing in POWER won't even see you. Do NOT compromise or negotiate with them because that is playing in power. Stand within yourself! BE free!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)