Victim, love your enemy--you created that monster. And you're the ONLY ONE who can CHOOSE to let that story be released from your reality.
Have you heard it said that we're each our own worst enemy?
If it's in your life, YOU put it there.
You created your monsters--every single one--but you created them unconsciously.
You were unaware that you created your reality every single breath, every single moment.
You were unaware that you, the pinpoint and source of consciousness of your own bubble of human reality, were radiating fear, that you had protective barriers and guards and weapons erected all around and within yourself--and that that armor was actually distorting the energies in service to you.
That consciousness armor was saying, "I don't trust myself. I don't trust others. If I let my guard down, someone or something will attack me."
So the energies, in loving service to you (the script-writer of your reality) match that guarded consciousness radiating from your center, and they attack you, they give your guards a reason for being in place.
Karma is for the unawakened creator. It was a balancing mechanism put in place for ensuring that we had a fullness of experience, a range of experiences along a duality spectrum with polar opposites of darkness and light. It was so we didn't get stuck in one polar experience, lifetime after lifetime.
If you're being abused in any way in this lifetime by a specific person or group, most likely you played the abuser for them in another lifetime. This is why self-forgiveness is so important. When you forgive yourself, you naturally then forgive all others. You see the beauty of this gift of experience that we call Life on Earth.
When you choose to let go of the past, you choose to release yourself and all others in your life from Karma. You've chosen to release all the actors from re-enacting over and over again the same old script, the same old story. You start your day brand new. You start each day of the rest of your life fresh, free and clear of the sleepy past. When you CHOOSE to AWAKEN from the limited human consciousness state, Karma then becomes obsolete, unnecessary. You simply CHOOSE to release yourself from Karma--and so it is.
Self-forgiveness is simply realizing that that abuser is not, and was not, an awakened human being. They were dead asleep in believing that they were simply a Little Human just trying to survive in a cruel world. They're most likely re-acting, or re-enacting your story together over and over again, simply because you're both afraid--and most of that fear is of one's own shadow. Neither of you trusted yourself, much less anyone else.
In the past, I knew simply saying "I forgive you" to someone else wasn't enough if I didn't sincerely CHOOSE to do that in my own heart. I did a great deal of soul-searching prior to those words, so I could say them and mean them with all my heart and soul. I CHOSE CLARITY, and I ACCEPTED FULL RESPONSIBILITY for my created reality. Accepting full responsibility meant that I did so with infinite SELF-COMPASSION! There was no room for blame or beating on myself--that's like beating on someone because they're simply in a coma.
Are you an Old Game Player,
or are you a Game Changer?
The choice is yours.
"God forgives you" or "God loves you" didn't cut it for me, because saying it that way was a roundabout way of actually saying, "I don't forgive you" or "I don't love you." And frankly, we can all spy pasted on smiles, fake, and mush from miles away. It's a waste of breath and time saying those words without meaning it, or without at least having the sincere desire to mean it. Having a sincere desire to mean it at least indicates that I've chosen to open the door to real forgiveness. And all we have to do is open up--open a door and invite it in.
Forgiveness is yours when you make it your own, instead of looking for some idol outside of you to do it. You're capable of unconditional love, infinite compassion and forgiveness--all those things humans used to believe only some higher-god-being outside of themselves was able to do. In fact, your soul, your Divinity, is always already doing that very thing.
Self-forgiveness is realizing that monster act that I played in the past was not really me, nor is the monster abusing me the real you. Those were scared, all-alone and insignificant-feeling Little Humans sound asleep in the midst of a terrifying nightmare. Panicked and frightened Little Humans do bizarre and crazy, crappy stuff. We created and acted out a play together based on that limited state of consciousness--and, yeah, it was ugly and repulsive to experience. The only way to get free of it is to choose to let our past scripts for ourselves, and each other, be released. To clear the script.
Don't be afraid of being honest with yourself. Don't be afraid of letting yourself be honest with the monsters in your life. You do know, it doesn't make sense to try to talk honestly with someone who is inebriated--alcohol and drugs get used as an excuse to be assholes and to do atrocious things. But if you feel safe when someone is sober, and you actually want to change the dynamics between the two of you, then open the door to speaking your heart with them. You can clear the air and change your relationship simply by MUTUALLY CHOOSING/AGREEING to talk honestly and openly with each other all the time. You can choose to create a SAFE and SACRED SPACE together.
Don't expect someone to read your mind about your desires--if you're truly done playing the Victim/Abuser game.
Love sets boundaries--you don't allow someone to harm you. That's where the victim plays the part of abuser. I've actually told someone who was ridiculing me, belittling me, that what they were doing was no longer acceptable for me. "You don't treat me like that. I won't allow it anymore."
Love lets go--so if you're afraid for your well-being in the scene that you have playing--please leave the scene. Get the heck out of the picture. Take the loved ones who need protection with you, and don't poke the bear. Don't stay in the same town feeding the gossip, taunting your created monster with your presence and the old story. Until you get that clarity and a true heart-felt feeling of forgiveness and trust of yourself--stay away. That's called giving oneself SAFE and SACRED SPACE.
Give yourself the TIME and SAFE SPACE to get clear about the story you have in play.
Give yourself the chance to choose true FORGIVENESS of self, and thus, all others. To realize that wasn't the true you.
Give yourself the chance to DROP the ARMOR, to open up that closed-in energy field.
Give yourself the chance to RADIATE new SELF-TRUST to create a CONSCIOUS REALITY--a life you actually enjoy living.
Take some deep and conscious breaths, bless the experience for the compassionate wisdom gained, and then let it go. Believe me, when I SIMPLY CHOSE let the past go that I used to feel so ashamed of myself in--it returned to me in a much grander perspective. I chose to FORGET the PAST, and in doing so, I set myself free. I realized so much more was going on within and around me than I gave myself and others credit for in my old limited Victim/Abuser consciousness--in that fight for power over and control of things and beings outside of oneself. I saw the true loving and compassionate being that I was and am--and it's a gift that is still expanding to this day and beyond. I found myself thanking all us actors for all parts played, whether right or seeming wrong. I finally experienced the joy of letting LETTING HUMAN JUDGMENT go.
All these years, I've personally had the sense that forgiveness wasn't complete until I had felt true GRATITUDE for all, in all ways. I'm happy to say, I actually do feel gratitude for everything and for all my experiences in this gift of play-acting together called My Life on Earth. It sings in me...
Related Posts:
Overcoming the Victimhood Addiction
We're all quite the characters--actors, that is--role-playing together. These are stories of my awakening, my remembering realization that Home/Heaven is wherever I am. That I am not the puppet on someone else's string. The search is over. I simply FREELY CHOSE to quit searching outside of myself, and realized all my answers have always been within.
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