I Don't Have Issues

I don't have issues...

There is NOTHING WRONG with me!

I am doing NOTHING WRONG! 

No one, nothing outside of me, is doing anything WRONG! I am the one who chose to hold energies for others--they didn't force them on me--they couldn't, unless some aspect of me chose to play the game with them.

All the pain I've been experiencing--for example, lower back and leg pain--is NOT MINE!...Take a deep breath, Pen...

All the issues I've been trying to "fix"--for example, Bella peeing on rugs--are NOT MINE!...Take a deep breath, Pen...

I am CONSCIOUSNESS and ENERGY SENSITIVE!

The energies and consciousness of large crowds of people used to literally physically stop me in my tracks. I couldn't step forward unless I closed my eyes and took a deep, center-in-myself breath. It used to be emotionally overwhelming, as well. About 97 percent of what we humans--all humans--feel and think is not our own consciousness. We're all connected--it's why we don't need words to communicate with one another--not really.

So...I have been FEELING the bombardment of all the chaotic changing energies as if they were ALL MINE. Little Human Penny has been THINKING that it all was something wrong with me, because I felt it all so personally. Little Human Penny, stuck in a twisted and complex mental rut, kept wondering and wandering in a circle, believing I was doing something wrong and "trying to figure out a solution"--or feelingly believing that I just had to put up with it...

Simply put: EVERYTHING health wise and relationship-wise that I've been experiencing and feeling IS NOT MY STUFF! I am energy sensitive. I NO LONGER CLAIM it as my own! I have NOTHING to fix, analyze, judge or handle. I have nothing to think about!

If it's in my life, I put it there. If it's still in my life, even though I don't like it, I'm benefiting from it...so...HOW am I using it to serve me?

In the past, Little Human Penny used pain as a means to ALLOW herself to quit trying to be of SERVICE in the old way--which was handing herself over as a main course for others to energetically feed off her. Being in too much pain to take care of others (remember the flood of 2011--she couldn't even walk) was easier for her to do than it was to simply say, "No."

Years ago, after the death of my first boyfriend, when I felt the most worthless, I used taking care of others outside of me as my sole purpose in being alive...and that's been a really tough habit to break. A person risks being rejected by loved ones for saying such things as, "No."

It's a difficult shift to make, even when, deep-down, I've known that if I'm always there to pick up the pieces when someone has CHOSEN (on some level) to stumble and fall in an experience, that I'm not ALLOWING that person to discover himself/herself. Sometimes the greatest honoring and most compassionate SERVICE is to just let it all go...even though I probably look like a heartless bitch...even though my loved one might not understand where I'm coming from.

I am much better at saying, "No," without needing an excuse for myself, with myself. I no longer need the pain in order to do so. The misery and lack of joy in life that I feel is NOT MINE!

I am consciousness and energy SENSITIVE...

...and I TRULY KNOW that All is well in All of Creation...